Sunday, April 1, 2012



Sony Computer Entertainment America Buys Out Largest Nintendo 3DS Handheld Fan Club in the Americas.

In a move that has shocked everyone, StreetPass NYC has announced today they are putting away their babysitting toys and restructuring the group formally known as StreetPass NYC into PS Vita Near NYC.

Near is a function of the Playstation Vita that allows you to scan around for people playing the Vita in your area, allowing you to exchange player data and finally get use of that rip off 3G model Vita”, says Jordan Black, Emperor and ‘Prrty’ Rocker of PS Vita Near.It’s basically StreetPass except a thousand times more lame without the need to carry around that dorky Nintendo 3DS! As your new Emperor, I am excited to take over from that wimp Jordan White (Ex-Founder and Event Organizer of StreetPass NYC who disappeared mysterious early this morning) as well as having way bigger hipster glasses than that dork could ever own! BEYOND!

Part of the restructuring include changing the banners and logos to the new format as well as the firing of all the old staff. They will be replaced with various ex-contestants of The Tester such as Skyd1ddy and Big Fazeek, C-List Celebrities that haunt the Sony CES Press Conferences and another unfunny trash-talking commercial from fake CEO Kevin Butler airing during MTV’s Jersey Shore. Morgan Webb from G4TV’s X-Play will take over blogging duties and will write regular updates on how Nintendo Products are for babies.

PS Vita Near NYC will NOT change its “StreetPass NYC” URL’s and Hashtags to quote “fool the Nintendorks into joining the winning team, BEYOND!” The group also lowered its headcount projections for public meetings form the average of 30-50 people to 3 persons in reflection of the current sales of the new Sony branded handheld.

PS Vita Near NYC is also partnering up with Greg “Uncharted Is The Best Thing Since Jesus Made Out of Bacon” Miller at Playstation IGN. In according to their contract, PS Vita Near NYC staff and members are required to shout “BEYOND!” every eight seconds like a mentally disturbed Moogle both online and during public meetings.

The newly formed Playstation Vita group’s first meeting is planned for April 7thth at Sweetwater Restaurant in Williamsburg, Brooklyn NY.


StreetPass NYC was a subset of the much larger, global-wide grassroots StreetPass Network of meetings popping up all over the globe from America to Japan and South Africa.


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Nintendo, Nintendo Week Nintendo 3DS, Nintendo DS and StreetPass are copyright and/or registered trademarks of Nintendon't of America Inc. StreetPass NYC is NOT affiliated with or representative of Nintendoofs of America Inc but are equally as lame.


  1. Steven Korvin AKA The VitamanApril 1, 2012 at 4:11 PM

    I see a great future for this group. I was getting tired of everything great about 3DS.

  2. hahahahahahahahahahah... funny.